GHOSTBOY (bleedforme17) wrote,

For the past couple of nights I have been sleeping with his shirt draped over my pillow.
It smells like him and in a way it comforts me. And for brief moments I can shut my eyes and pretend he's with me. Sleeping peacefully with my arm draped around his side. Quiet except for the fan whirring softly.

pathetic, isn't it ?

I guess I am as in love with him as I ever was. Pretty difficult to deny with my face pressing into his discarded clothes. Except now I understand that the feeling will never be mutual.

Even though just a few nights ago I had him gasping and spilling himself over my fingers, soaking my bedsheets.

It doesn't matter really. We will never be anything more than what we are now. Whatever that is. I feel no need to question things anymore. I know that some times he longs for my hands, and the way I touch him as though his skin is precious and worthy of adornment. And yet his eyes linger in every direction except mine. Still, I know what he means to me.
I guess that will have to be enough.


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